Caramel-Apple Pie Recipe

Caramel-Apple Pie

Caramel-Apple Pie

Makes: 10 servings
Prep: 35 minutes
Bake: 55 minutes

Ingredients

1 recipe Piecrust (see recipe below)
1 cup granulated sugar
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
6 cups peeled and coarsely chopped Jonathan apples
1/2 cup caramel-apple dip
2 tablespoons milk
1 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup packed brown sugar
1/2 cup butter

Directions

Prepare Piecrust. On a lightly floured surface, roll dough from center to edge into a 12-inch circle. Wrap pastry around a rolling pin. Unroll into a 9-inch pie plate. Ease pastry into pie plate. Trim to 1/2 inch beyond edge of plate. Fold under pastry; crimp. Don’t prick pastry.
For filling, in a large bowl, combine granulated sugar, the 1/4 cup flour, and the cinnamon. Add the apples and toss to coat. Transfer to pastry-lined pie plate. Combine 2 tablespoons of the caramel-apple dip and the milk; drizzle over apples.
In a mixing bowl, combine the 1 cup flour and the brown sugar. Cut in butter until mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Sprinkle over filling. Cover edge of pie with foil to prevent overbrowning. Place on a baking sheet.
Bake in a 350 degree F oven for 30 minutes. Remove foil. Bake for 25 to 30 minutes more or until golden. Cool 10 minutes. Drizzle remaining caramel dip over top. Cool pie on a wire rack.
 

Piecrust: In a medium bowl, cut 1/3 cup butter into 1-1/4 cups all-purpose flour with a pastry blender until pieces are the size of peas. Sprinkle 1 tablespoon milk over part of the mixture; gently toss with a fork. Repeat moistening the dough, using 3 tablespoons more milk (1 tablespoon at a time), until all the dough is moistened. Shape into a ball.

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101 ways to celebrate Valentine’s Day

    Remember to say "I love you" and "I need you" often.

  1. Walk hand in hand in the rain.
  2. Write a love poem.
  3. Call a radio station and dedicate a favorite song.
  4. Write "I Love You" in lipstick or shaving cream on the mirror.
  5. Hide love notes in a lunch box, briefcase or purse.
  6. Make heart-shaped cinnamon toast for breakfast.
  7. Place a love note in the personals section of the newspaper.
  8. Take a carriage ride around the city.
  9. Plan a surprise getaway.
  10. Do your mate’s household chores.
  11. Write notes on future dates in their date book ("I love you," I miss you," etc.)
  12. Make reservations at a favorite restaurant.
  13. Let them choose the movie.
  14. Give a foot massage.
  15. Make a heart-shaped bookmark, and place it in their book.
  16. Pop in a romantic music CD and slow dance.
  17. Throw a just-because surprise party for two.
  18. Buy a stuffed animal for your honey.
  19. Read each other’s horoscopes.
  20. Make a list of the top 10 things you love about your partner.
  21. Display it in a prominent place.
  22. Tattoo your mate’s name on your body.
  23. Make an album or scrapbook of your favorite memories together.
  24. Go camping together and only take one sleeping bag.
  25. Send a mushy message in a bottle…a balloon…a sandwich…
  26. Cut out a silly cartoon that you know they’d enjoy.
  27. Shower together.
  28. Dim the lights, and snuggle together on the couch.
  29. Be the first to say "I’m sorry" and kiss and make up.
  30. Give each other a full-body massage.
  31. Kiss every hour on the hour all day long.
  32. Send a gift basket of indulgent items.
  33. Write "I’m hot for you" in the steam on the bathroom mirror.
  34. Ribbon wrap your bed with a big bow.
  35. Fill up the gas tank of your partner’s car.
  36. Act like teenagers. Maybe even pierce something!
  37. Show up with a bouquet of flowers — for no reason at all.
  38. Play Scrabble® together, using as many "love" words as you can.
  39. Run a warm bubble bath for your partner, with lots of lit candles.
  40. Meet in the park for a picnic.
  41. Hold hands.
  42. Leave a trail of rose petals through the house, leading to a romantic candlelight dinner.
  43. Make a donation in your mate’s name to a special cause or charity.
  44. Pick up their clothes from the floor — without saying a word about it.
  45. Watch an old black and white romantic movie and share a bowl of popcorn.
  46. Reenact your first date.
  47. Surprise your partner with tickets to a special event.
  48. An unexpected hug can brighten any day.
  49. Buy a silly, impromptu gift.
  50. Send an email just to say "I’m thinking of you."
  51. Bring home a balloon bouquet.
  52. Serve breakfast in bed.
  53. Make an ornament with a picture of both of you for the Christmas tree.
  54. Play tag.
  55. Wash and wax your partner’s car, and leave a little note on the dashboard.
  56. Plant a garden together.
  57. Leave a mushy message on voicemail.
  58. Stay at a hotel for the night, just because.
  59. Make angels in the snow.
  60. Every time you say "hello" or "goodbye", seal it with a hug and a kiss.
  61. Take a drive in the country.
  62. Spend the evening looking at the stars — and make a wish together.
  63. Cast a playful wink any time, anywhere.
  64. Think up a list of silly little pet names for times when you’re alone together.
  65. Read poetry to each other.
  66. Celebrate your half-birthdays together.
  67. Put a picture of both of you in your wallet.
  68. Buy that favorite book or CD for no reason at all.
  69. Send a care package to work filled with treats like food, photos, candy, a love note, heart-shaped confetti, etc.
  70. Go out for the evening and tell people you’re on your honeymoon.
  71. Take a hike together and carve your initials in a tree.
  72. Write a thank you note for all the things you take for granted.
  73. Make a fire in the fireplace and roast marshmallows.
  74. Tape your favorite TV show and spend the evening talking.
  75. Do the dishes together, then apply hand lotion to each other’s hands.
  76. Write a love letter to your partner and cut it into jigsaw puzzle pieces.
  77. Decide on secret signals and use them to communicate with each other in large groups of people.
  78. Schedule a regular mid-week "date night" for just the two of you.
  79. Do the laundry together.
  80. Romance Theater Weekend: reenact each other’s favorite love scene – hers on Friday, his on Saturday.
  81. Call your partner at work and ask for a date.
  82. Pretend you haven’t seen each other for a month. Act accordingly.
  83. Send a written invitation to do something special.
  84. Take turns reading to each other.
  85. Stand outside the window and sing a romantic song.
  86. Hide favorite candy in your partner’s coat pockets.
  87. Put a tape recording of your voice (saying anything) in the car stereo and turn it on so it plays when the car starts.
  88. Go to a drive-in movie.
  89. Get up to turn off the last light after you’re both comfy-cozy in bed.
  90. Hold each other tight during a thunderstorm.
  91. Make a tape recording of favorite love songs.
  92. Leave a bunch of bananas on the kitchen table with a note, "I go bananas over you!"
  93. Hide love notes in a magazine.
  94. Declare your undying love via a telegram.
  95. Make a romantic dinner together, and serve it on your finest china.
  96. Surprise your partner with a big kiss on the neck.
  97. Give unexpected compliments.
  98. Share an ice cream cone.
  99. Have a picnic on the living room floor.
  100. Draw a silly picture of the two of you. Frame it.
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Humor?

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

Q: Are you sexually active?
A: No, I just lie there.
******************************

Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July 15th
Q: What year?
A: Every year.
******************************

Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
******************************

Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget? Can you give us an example of something that you’ve forgotten?
******************************

Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.
******************************

Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, “Where am I, Cathy?”
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.
******************************

Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.
******************************

Q: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?
A: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
******************************

Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
******************************
Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
******************************

Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?
******************************

Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?
******************************
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
******************************

Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female?
******************************

Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
******************************

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
******************************

Q: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.
******************************

Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
******************************

Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
******************************

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting in a jar on my desk.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law

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Rodney danger classics

I tell ya I get no respect from anyone.

I bought a cemetery plot. The guy said, ‘There goes the neighborhood!

When I was born, I was so ugly that the doctor slapped my mother.

During sex my wife always wants to talk to me. Just the other night she called me from a hotel.

When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me. … and no one showed up.

When we got married, the first thing my wife did was put everything under both names – hers and her mother’s.

When I was 3 years old, my parents got a dog. I was jealous of the dog, so they got rid of me.

With my wife, I get no respect. I fell asleep with a cigarette in my hand. She lit it.

A hooker once told me she had a headache.

With my wife, I get no respect. The other night there was a knock at the door. My wife told me to hide in the closet.

I asked my wife: “how come you never tell me when you have an orgasm?” She said: “you’re never there”.

I never got girls when I was a kid. One girl told me, `Come on over, there’s nobody home.’ I went over. There was nobody home.

I’m not a sexy guy. I went to a hooker. I dropped my pants. She dropped her price.

I tell ya when I was a kid, all I knew was rejection. My yo-yo, it never came back!

I worked in a pet store and people kept asking how big I’d get.

My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend.

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